No, if that is not a depressing title to a blog post, you need to get out more. Unfortunately, 2014 brought a few family deaths to our home, and with them came the decision to take the kids out of school and to the funeral. The last time this topic came to our home was when we lost my husband’s Grandfather Cordell on my son’s second birthday. So, it’s been a while for the discussion of how old is old enough for funerals and funeral homes.
Here in the south, we do funerals. Especially in my husbands family. He can remember staying at the funeral home all night with loved ones. I was happy to get to go home after 3-6 hours. I can still feel awkward at the long hours he feels comfortable with at funerals. But I think some of my differences have to do with my job where I see much more death than I would like.
So, back to my topic, when are kids old enough to go to funerals? Well, since all three are in school now, I got off easy this time. We elected not to take them out of school. But what if we had, how do you explain death to a five year old? Cord does not grasp the concept of waiting till Christmas, so how do you enforce concepts of death and forever? I think my ten almost eleven year old would do fine. But the eight year old feels things so deeply. She still ask about a grandfather she has never met and about a great-grandmother who died weeks after getting to hold her for the first time.
Sometimes it’s easier to skip some conversations till they are older – not sure that is the right parenting decision, but then I am never sure what is the right parenting decision sometimes.
So, I go on asking in faith daily to make the best parenting decisions that God will have me make, and hope that they grow to be better adults than I am. Maybe waiting on funerals is one idea that won’t hurt.
“I believe in God as I believe the sun has risen, not because I can see it, but because by way of it, I can see everything else.
– C. S. Lewis “